Jim at 67. Does age difference really matter?

Jim wrote me wondering about age difference. This is the most talked about topic from friends around the world. Does age difference really matter? I shared some thoughts that I hope will offer a little more insight on the subject……. Enjoy!

Jim’s Letter…

Hi Bill and Larisa, thanks for your help.

I find Alla to be a beautiful woman. She appears to be a down to earth type person. Does she interest me, yes. Bill my only concern is her age. After reading articles regarding reasonable age differences, I wonder about the age gap of 30 years.

I am sure that you and Larisa know far more about Alla than I do. What is your take on the age difference and what does Alla think? I love children, so Alla having 2 children is not a problem for me.

Thanks for the efforts of you and Larisa.

Bill’s Response…

Hi Jim, thanks for writing…..

Age difference is often the first topic that comes up regarding cross cultural relationships. The first rule of thumb is this…. If two people truly love each other, age doesn’t matter. This school of thought is worldwide. That said, age does have a lot to do with many things in our everyday life as a person.

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Common Life Experiences…

When there’s a great age difference between two people, there are fewer common life experiences to build on together as a loving couple.

This could be looked at as a disadvantage towards developing and maintaining a strong lifelong relationship. Age difference should be regarded as an opportunity to learn from each others book of life. It just makes common sense, the younger we are, the less we know.

As we continue to grow through life, we learn from our successes and failures as well as examples set by others. When someone is in their twenties, for most of us, our adult lives are just beginning.

Bill and Larisa First Met Twelve Years Ago…

25, Time to Have a Baby…

For women at the age of 25, the road of life gets much more serious. If a Ukrainian woman isn’t in a genuine relationship by the time she’s 25, she might be considered an old maid.

This has everything to do with child bearing age as well as the concern for proper health care. I’ve been told this by many women and men of all ages here. It’s always been part of the culture. Slavic men look at life more seriously towards their late twenties as opposed to their early twenties.

This is for several reasons, including the fact that there are more women here than men. Many men still live with mom and dad into their late twenties and early thirties. Obviously, there is no pressure for men to create a life of their own.

Eight Years Age Difference…

For men, theirs no reason to marry early, there are plenty of women to develop a relationship with. For a man, by waiting a little longer, he has time to experience several relationships and have a better chance of finding a lifelong partner.

The average age difference for a man and woman who are in a serious relationship in a cross cultural relationship with a woman from the FSU, is eight years. That said, the older a woman is here, the less importance placed on age difference.

Love or Money?…

Every woman I’ve met in Nikolaev is more interested in what’s in a mans heart, not his pocketbook. That’s true whether the man comes from Ukraine or any other country in the world.

For most women under the age of 25 to fall in love with a man in his 40’s, she will love your money much more than you. It’s probably true with men and women from most countries to have this same kind of mindset.

Chemistry, Luck and Age…

My observations are based on my experience with hundreds of people while living in Ukraine over the past decade. If a man is serious, knows what he’s doing and has decided to seek a life partner in Ukraine, anything is possible.

While eight years is the average age difference, I truly believe that twenty is the maximum. That said, Larisa and I are nineteen years apart. We don’t talk about age difference. In fact, age has never a topic for discussion.

Looking back, for both of us, it just seemed natural to get to know more about each other without dwelling on age. We both agree that we were lucky to have found each other and their is no question about our chemistry.

Scammers in Nikolaev. Is she honest?

Nearing The Age of Forty…

As a Ukrainian woman approaches the age of 40, there is an increasing likelihood that she isn’t as concerned about age difference. She is more interested in finding a man that’s responsible, honest and loving.

An honest man should think the same way. If you and a Ukrainian woman can find common ground with that magic and chemistry, anything is possible.

The First Meeting. This is a Must Read!

Money, Flat and Job…

A Ukrainian woman in her 40’s is also less likely to consider a relationship with a foreigner. Why? It’s all about where she is in her life and the near future. Most Ukrainian women in their 40’s are set for life.

Many own a flat, have money in the bank, have a great job. Being less dependent on others, creates independence without the need to gamble with a foreign relationship.

Best regards,

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Want to know more? We would like to help you. Remember that each person is different. Every situation requires a unique perspective. No two people share the identical circumstances. If you are planning to be successful and find your angel, create a plan that works.